Marie Buda

Discovering the River Towards Inner Freedom

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Writing From a Place of Serenity

July 14, 2016 by lyra777 Leave a Comment

Now that I’ve vowed to myself that I will write about anything I want, suddenly I want to post about everything.

I do feel like this is not some random burst of excitement that might die down just as quickly. Even when I wasn’t blogging I was always thinking about things I wanted to write about. I would construct the blog in my mind and happily think about how I would convey my thoughts to the reader. But I never actually did it.

Now that I’m finally putting these daydreams into practice I can’t describe how much better I feel. I am bringing some much needed flow back into my life. I understand it’s going to be a wobbly start because I’m still trying to find my voice. When I read my own writing I can significantly feel which bits I wrote from the heart, and bits that I didn’t so much. The difficultly is that growing up we are taught by various people how to write. Our parents first teach us what is right or wrong, and then at school a certain style is demanded of us. We soon start to adapt our writing into something that we think will get that A grade or will be applauded by others. Often in the back of our minds the question isn’t “I am expressing in writing what I truly feel?” but “I am writing in a way that other people will approve of?”.

In other words, we write from a place of fear.

Fear that other people won’t accept what and how we communicate. We desperately try to avoid the sinking feeling of rejection and ridicule. When we do avoid it, and people give us a positive stamp of approval, we get a rush of excitement. Positive reinforcement. This can become almost addictive. The trouble with having this sort of relationship with writing is that while the highs can be ecstatic, the lows can really bum you out. Instead of being content with the beautiful act of creativity, your happiness is defined by the reactions of other people.

I want to get to a place where I’m consistently writing from a place of calm, loving presence, which in turn will cultivate creativity. A place where I am writing what I want, how I want to, without worrying what people think. A place where I am constantly enjoying the mere act of writing, regardless of the consequences it brings. A place of serenity.

 

Filed Under: Acceptance, Creativity, Fear, Love Tagged With: Creativity, Love, Overcoming fear, Writing

Change is the Only Constant

July 11, 2016 by lyra777 Leave a Comment

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Very shortly, I will be changing the look and content of this website.

There is so much more to me than simply my academic background, and I wanted my website to reflect this. In the past there were so many things I wanted to blog about, but I didn’t because it wasn’t related to psychology or neuroscience. The result was writing only two blog posts within the last three years.

This is a shame, as I love writing with a passion. It’s one of the few activities where I feel like I can engage my heart. It’s one of those things where you ache to do more of it, but you leave it to ‘someday’.

But I’m going to be honest – I’m scared to bits about doing this. I’m scared about writing openly and publicly about things I truly and deeply care about, such as spirituality and life development. This is because it isn’t in line with the ‘professional’ image that I tried to create when I set-up this website three years ago.

Why not just create a new website, one for professional use, and the other for personal?

I actually have done this. I had a personal website that focused on my journey towards eating paleo. You’re welcome to read it here. However, somehow having two websites doesn’t feel right. I feel like to continue with two websites would be to continue creating a false image based on how I think people around me expect to see me. I will continue to hide who I actually am inside if I continue separating the two.

So I’m taking the plunge.

I will make the changes gradually, probably starting simply with new blog posts. Eventually I will start making changes to the website itself. Watch this space!

Filed Under: Self Discovery Tagged With: Change, Overcoming fear

About Me

Hi there! I'm Marie. I'm a behavioural science consultant with a PhD in cognitive neuroscience. I explore what sets us free and brings us peace. A millennial-in-awakening. Read More…

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